Why Parents Need to Be First Responders

Don't let the faces fool you, they loved their costumes.

When my daughter was in the 5th grade she decided she wanted to dress up as the Tin Man for Halloween. That was fine, but she also decided she wanted me to make her costume! I was very content with the idea of buying her a Tin Man costume, but for some reason she had it in her head that she wanted me to make it for her. I even went online and showed her pictures of Tin Man costumes I could easily buy for her, but she wasn't having it. In her mind, the only option was for me to figure out how to make the costume for her.

Now I do consider myself somewhat of an artist. More of a performance artist than anything, but I had never ventured into the world of costume design. This was all new to me and I felt like it was beyond my realm of capabilities. I tried to plead my case to her, that she'd be better off letting me buy the costume instead of making it, but she was standing firm on what she wanted. I pressed her more about reconsidering, and then I saw a shift in the way she looked at me. She didn't want me to make it for her because she thought I could make an amazing costume that would be better than the ones you could buy. She wanted me to make it for her because I'm her Daddy and in her mind, her Daddy could do anything.

I was letting her down. She was excited about us having this special moment together and I looked for any and every excuse for us not to have that moment. Thankfully it finally registered with me what was really going on, and I shifted my energy. I told her I'd do it if we could go shopping for the supplies and figure out how to make it...together. We both did our best and a wonderful shared experience. And while the end product wasn't perfect (I joked that she looked like the Tin Man after he got attacked by the flying monkeys!), it was totally worth it.

As parents, caregivers, educators, or service providers, we must be intentional about being the first responders to the needs of our children. We understand that there are plenty of people that would love to respond to the needs and wants of our kids...for all the wrong reasons.

What I tell myself and any other adult that is connected to young people is that if we don't respond to them, someone else will. And there is a strong chance it would not be our first choice of people.

A few years ago, we had the privilege of being a part of an amazing campaign called Day 1 Dads. The mission of the initiative is to empower, involve, and uplift fathers actively so they can experience meaningful engagement in their child's life before birth and well beyond. Basically to equip fathers to be first responders. If you're a father, mother, caregiver, or anyone invested in seeing children thrive and flourish, I would encourage you to visit their website.

And here's a quick video I made in partnership with Chestnut Health Systems that talks a little bit more the importance of being first responders with our children. As always, please share the blog and video with your network.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-OHbzmfCIo

Thank you so much for the work you do,

but most importantly for the person you are.

Also don't forget to share this to your socials!