Why Being Remembered Doesn't Always Matter...
- R.E.A.C.H. Team
- Aug 19, 2025
- 4 min read
I was on the phone with my daughter yesterday and she said next Monday is the last first day of school I'll ever have. She graduates from college in the spring and I'm so proud of her journey. She and I have traveled very different paths. I didn't graduate for college till I was well into my 30's. And getting through high school? It took a lot of work and a lot of extra help from some teachers who really cared about getting me across the finish line. And I got there! I graduated 113th out of 143 students, which means I was thirty students from the bottom of my class. And the fact that I had to stop and triple-check that math is a classic example of why I need to be thankful I even graduated.
Needless to say, I wasn’t asked to give a graduation speech, but if I had been, there’s one teacher I know I would have thanked...Mr. Marshall.
Mr. Marshall had been my eighth-grade history teacher in middle school, and when I moved on to high school, there he was again. The irony is, he never once was one of my actual teachers during high school. The closest he came was being my study hall monitor in ninth grade.
We’d talk during study hall, and he would ask me what my plans and goals were. I didn’t have an answer. But when he saw me drifting the wrong direction, he was the first teacher to call it out. Whenever he saw me carrying on like I was a thug, he’d shake his head and say, “That ain’t you. You’re better than this. You’re more than this.”
I could see the disappointment in his eyes when he’d walk into the office and see me sitting there after getting kicked out of class or written up for in-school suspension. “You’re better than this. You’re more than this.”
It got to the point where sometimes if I saw him in the hallway, I would go the other way. Not because I didn’t like him, but because deep down I knew he was right. And it was hard to face the truth.
By senior year, I had finally got my act together and thanks to the Youth to Youth program, I had made a complete 180 degree turn! On my last first day of school, I couldn’t wait to track him down and show him I had changed. When he saw me, he lit up. I told him, “I’m going to prove you right, Mr. Marshall. Watch how this year goes. I’m going to prove you right, and everybody else wrong.” He just smiled and said, “I’ll be around. Whatever you need, if I got it, I’ll give it.”
He kept checking in on me that year. And I remember after a run-in with another teacher that almost got me expelled, I went straight to him. I told him how stuff like that made me want to just give up. He looked at me and said, “Your past doesn’t have to disqualify you from your future. It starts with the choices you make from this moment on. The choices you make from this moment on are the ones that matter most.”
I’ve carried that with me ever since. A constant reminder that who I was does not have to be who I am or who I’m becoming.
Fast forward 15 years after graduation. I hadn’t seen Mr. Marshall since the day I walked across that stage. By then, I was deep into my speaking career, working for Youth to Youth, passing on the message Mr. Marshall had given me about not letting my past disqualify me from my future. I was giving a speech to a full high school auditorium. Towards the end, I told the story about the one teacher who believed in me when others gave up. I mentioned his name, Mr. Marshall. Suddenly, I noticed the whole student body turning their heads to the right. Murmurs filled the room. I glanced over, and there he was. Standing right there. Mr. Marshall. My knees almost buckled. I couldn’t believe it. The man I had been praising, the man I had credited with helping me survive high school, was standing right there. He looked exactly the same. I got choked up but confirmed to the students that this wasn’t planned. I had no idea he was there. The students gave him a huge standing ovation. And I knew right then, I wasn’t the only life he had impacted.
Afterward, I beelined straight to him, hugged him, and thanked him again. Then I asked if he remembered any of the things he said or did for me in high school.
His answer? Nope. Not really. He didn’t remember any of it.
At first, that threw me off. How could something that meant so much to me mean so little to him? But then I realized, he didn’t do it to be remembered or thanked. He didn’t do it for accolades. He did it because that’s who he was. That’s how he was built. And because it was the right thing to do.
And that’s the lesson I’ve carried with me to this day. Do good and be good, not for the recognition, but because it’s the right thing to do.
School is back in session and every student and staff member needs to remember that everyday is a new chapter we get to write in our life story. Every day is a chance to do and be better, starting with the choices we make from this moment on.
Here's a real short video from my one man show, From This Moment On. It's a great message to motivate students and staff at the beginning of this new year and new life chapter.
As always, if you like this, share it with people you care about.
